Unexpected Turbulence

I was sitting on a plane reading a book. My hair had fallen into my face and I went to move it out of the way. As I ran my fingers through my hair to push it off my face, it triggered a memory. I was reminded of a trip to see my Mom. I had come to town to go with her to a family reunion. Her side of the family gets together every couple of years and I invited myself to go with her. I had never met any of these people and naturally, I was curious about them.

Before we were to make the drive to the reunion site, we were sitting on the couch together and she was showing me family photos and family tree type documents for her family. As I sat there reading, she reached out and touched the back of my head, running her fingers through my hair. It surprised me. It was a seemingly spontaneous gesture that I didn’t have to initiate. I should have been pleased. Perhaps for a moment I was. I think I was so focused on the fact that it happened that I didn’t really stay “present” and enjoy it. Does that make sense?

It was sad for me to think that moment was going to stick with me for no better reason than its blatant uniqueness. And then I was angry for the same reason. It almost made me wish it hadn’t happened. Almost.

Sometimes simple gestures are complicated.