Evolution

Since the ball dropped to ring in the New Year, I have been giving some thought to evolution. Not so much about the fact that I am able to walk upright and have opposable thumbs, but more about the fact that I am a long way from where I was even 12 months ago. I suppose it is natural to begin a new year by thinking about where you have been as a way to help choose a direction for the road ahead.

This year the road looks to be taking me to a lot of new places, physically, mentally, and of course, emotionally. I have accepted a new job offer. It’s scary because it’s change, and it’s exciting for the same reason. I knew I had a choice to make: continue in the same comfortable path or shake up my reality with something similar and yet completely new. I guess you can see which way I went. This particular path is going to be pretty intense for a while, as I get up to speed on how things operate. It will be exciting to feel so absorbed in work again rather than the comforting numbness of walking the same path with my current job.

With the new job, I am also looking to make one other significant change this year. I want to move again. Not out of this city, but out of this apartment. It’s finally time to buy up some property again. I know I have already mentioned the decorating virus I have contracted, and it’s only going to get worse until I address it (with a new address-ha, ha). Although I am not looking forward to getting back in the water with the sharks disguised as realtors, I find I am much better armed to deal with them than I was the first time I purchased something. I am hoping to make this change during the first part of this year.

The other evolutionary aspect I have been thinking about is more of an internal shifting. I feel like I am starting to enter into the next phase of my personal development: the procedure years. I feel like I have done a decent job of weathering such memorable years as:

• The Early 20’s -Who am I? Why do I have to decide today what the rest of my life is going to be?
• The Mid 20’s -Who am I? I have to be married right now if I plan to stay on track for my life plan.
• Turning 30 -What the Hell happened to the plan? Ok, I need a new plan. Thank God my 20’s are over. Let’s focus on career and go back to school.
• Early 30’s -Hmm. Everyone is in baby mode. They’re cute, but I’m going out to buy shoes. Why is my body starting to turn against me? I need a fresh start in a new location. I think I will pick up and move across the country.
• Turning 35 -Why are conversations with my friends and family centered on health? When did we all start to get old and more dependent on pills? Where the Hell is my life going? Who said it was time to start losing family members? Did I really just yell at everyone I know to put a will together?
  
  

I’m not a big fan of this latest phase, I have to be honest. Getting older and all that it entails scares the bejesus out of me. Over time I have noticed that odd books have started to appear on my bookshelf. Instead of fun, mindless girl-fun books I am looking at titles like You: The Owner’s Manual, and You: On a Diet. Yesterday I got all excited over buying patterns for clothes and picking up a sewing book. I see lots of whole-wheat food items on my grocery list. How can I really be this age? In my head I swear I am much younger.

In a couple of weeks I am going on vacation with my girlfriends from college. I love the fact that we have been able to keep in touch so well and that we are able to take time to spend time together. They are my touchstones. I think it is natural to look to the people you grew up with and compare/contrast where you are. It doesn’t have to be in a competitive, point-scoring kind of way, but I find it interesting to see the different paths we have all chosen and how we have all weathered those choices so far. I do the same thing with my siblings. Despite growing up in the same house, we have naturally all taken some different paths and it is interesting to observe how we all deal with our own choices. The evolution of my relationships with my siblings is what I hold most dear these days. We are at a point where we can mostly discard the roles we maintained when we were younger. Although some are more difficult to shed than others, I feel like we have all been able to add so much more depth and honesty based on our personal choices and experiences. I adore them.

So, in the spirit of change and evolution, I must give you a Top 5 song list. Except I think I need to make it a Top 10. Here we go:

1. Spinning Wheel- Blood, Sweat and Tears
2. Changes- David Bowie
3. Everybody’s Changing- Keane
4. Everything Must Change- Paul Young
5. Money Changes Everything- Cyndi Lauper
6. Revolution Calling- Queensryche
7. Breaking the Habit- Linkin Park
8. Cool Change- Little River Band
9. Tomorrow Never Knows- The Beatles
10. Love This Life- Crowded House
    
    

And finally, here is another installment from my Who Knew? book:

No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.